This, too, shall pass.

For some reason, I did what I have vowed not to do again – check on their facebook accounts. I honestly didn’t mean to. I just “accidentally” stumbled into her account, and then I discovered that she has a “new” account, and there…she posts their pictures together. Or at least, the ones viewable by the public are “edited” to the point where silhouettes/almost silhouettes are visible. But it’s them. And his brothers and sisters “like” their pictures. It’s gross. Very gross. They are a weird family with really loose values.

Money and financial gain are probably the most important to them. Or it could be that their parents just haven’t raised them into…..I don’t know!!!!! I DON’T WANT TO CARE WHY THEY’RE A MESSED UP KIND OF PEOPLE. I just wish it’s not something genetic because I don’t want my son to have what they have. GRRRRRRR.

Whew.

It still hurts. Bad. I know it I don’t love him anymore. But the feeling of rejection is still here. Stings.

One of my friends have told me that I must be honest with myself regarding my feelings. And this is how I feel. Betrayed. Angry. Grossed out. I may hate them, maybe.

But, on the other hand…I know that this will end. I feel the hope somewhere like a tiny ray of light. I feel that I am not doomed to be in this situation forever.

God is good. And I have hope. 🙂

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