secret rendezvous

in the parking lot i wait for you. i smell my breath and check my makeup.

you come in. you say hi and smile that irresistible smile you have.

i lean over and hold your cheek, make you face me and i smell your breath. beer. just beer and no smoke. i like it. i love it.

i kiss you. soft at first. then it slowly become fierce and hard. as if there wont be a next time.

tongues. lips. i bite your lip a little. you bite mine, softly and i love it.

your hand. rough and callused. you touch my thigh. without hesitations your hand goes higher until you touch me there. your fingers. gentle, ever so gentle fingers. they find their destination.

it is heaven.

i moan. i kiss. you kiss back. i call out your name. you kiss me some more.

my phone rings. you let out a soft sigh. i pick it up from the dashboard and i answer it.

i need to get back, they say. we are to head back home. i say okay on my way im driving.

and i kiss you again. harder. harder and i dont ever want to stop.

you touch me again. more eager. more intent. i moan i breath hard.

my fingers. delicate and soft. i find your hardness in the darkness. without looking i managed to open your zipper. your jeans are hiding something. i like that that thing. i touch it and i like it in my hands. you moan. i love hearing you moan. your deep voice that says i surrender. i am yours and yours and yours.

it gets rough. it gets hot. it gets wild in my mind. and your tongue is relentless. you bite my lower lip and i cant get enough of it.

it gets rougher as my phone rings again. i ignore it. it is just you and me. just you and me in my car in my world in my minute in my mind.

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Hopeful Tuesday

Hopeful Tuesday

“Thanks for loving me despite what bearing your children did to my body.”

When I was newly wed, my then husband told me I must stay in shape. He said, he would give me 100 thousand bucks every year if I maintain my waistline at a certain measurement. The young and foolish me agreed to the that, thinking that it was just a simple challenge.

Now, I know better. If someone loves you, really loves you, then there would be no such “agreements” or “challenges”…nothing that involves a standard that is so skin-deep.

I am now a hopeful single mom. Hopeful for a future where there would be this man who would love me and care for me even if I become as big as a whale or if a lose all the fats in my body, so long as I am happy and that I am able to make my family happy.

Of Gifts & Kisses

Little boy just gave me a very sticky kiss (thanks to the lollipop he was eating)– what a yummy kiss! That was his thank you to me for a new toy car I bought for him. Oh, just cheap toys they sell in the store near the clinic. The big big grin and twinkly eyes –his reaction to having new toys– are just so priceless!

Happy day!